Power and Conflict

What is power and how can it be used constructively or destructively?

Power can be defined as the degree to which we are able to advance our own goals and to influence the ability of others to meet their goals in a given conflict.

Power is largely a matter of perception. Power is not something we own. Rather, it is a matter of how we perceive our own power and how others perceive our power. Each person in a conflict approaches the other with an idea of the degree of power each person has. Perceptions of the power relationship may differ and, as a result, the actual power relationship may play out quite differently than expected. If your power source is of no consequence or importance to the other person, it will not be effective.

How does power work in conflict?

Power is at the root of conflict. As soon as the interests, values, or needs of one person impact on another person, conflict emerges and power dynamics come into play. Power can be used constructively or destructively in the attainment of each person’s goals. Constructive uses of power tend toward de-escalation of the conflict. Destructive uses tend toward escalation.

Simple disagreements that escalate into conflicts are often really about power. The actual issue in dispute is minor, although the intensity of the conflict is great. However, since power is something we tend to not talk about explicitly, the focus usually stays on the specific dispute. Until the power conflict is resolved, many other disputes between the parties will contain the same power dynamic.