{"id":86,"date":"2023-01-19T16:23:55","date_gmt":"2023-01-19T21:23:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/?post_type=chapter&#038;p=86"},"modified":"2023-11-15T19:18:16","modified_gmt":"2023-11-16T00:18:16","slug":"resiliency","status":"web-only","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/chapter\/resiliency\/","title":{"raw":"Resiliency","rendered":"Resiliency"},"content":{"raw":"Before we can delve into the practice of self-care, we must understand what resiliency is. <strong>Resilience<\/strong> means being able to care for ourselves so we can also care for others. Resiliency is being flexible and engaging in effective coping mechanisms during everyday challenges or major life stressors. . These can be incidences ranging from having a bad day to those that have a lasting impact such as a serious illness, the death of someone you love or a terrible accident. Everyone has their own threshold of resilience and the ability to \u201cbounce back\u201d from adversity by being flexible in adjusting to change. Some people\u2019s \u201cstraw that broke the camel\u2019s back\u201d occurs sooner than others.\r\n\r\n<em>Stressful events don\u2019t have to define the outcome of how your life unfolds \u2013 increased resiliency can help you get through difficult circumstances and empower you to experience personal growth during various moments in your life.<\/em>\r\n\r\n<strong>What qualities would a resilient individual likely have?<\/strong>\r\n<ul>\r\n \t<li>Tends to have a positive view<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has a hopeful outlook<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Views change as a challenge<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has a healthy emotional attachment to others<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has a sense of humor<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has a sense of personal competence<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has a sense of self-compassion<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Takes opportunities for physical activity<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Asks for help<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Utilize problem solving and thinking of different ways to see situations<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Has effective coping strategies<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Manages emotions and impulses<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Is focused on the present<\/li>\r\n \t<li>Is able to identify realistic plans and steps[footnote]Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf[\/footnote]<\/li>\r\n<\/ul>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n[caption id=\"attachment_204\" align=\"aligncenter\" width=\"1024\"]<a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE.png\"><img class=\"wp-image-204 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"768\" \/><\/a> Figure 24.1 Resilience[\/caption]\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<blockquote>\r\n<div class=\"textbox shaded\">\r\n\r\n<span style=\"color: #ff0000\">Resiliency is NOT\u2026<\/span>\r\n\r\n\u2026never feeling impacted by negative things\r\n\r\n\u2026never feeling stress, anxiety, or anger\r\n\r\n\u2026a trait you\u2019re born with\r\n\r\n\u2026fixed for life\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n&nbsp;<\/blockquote>\r\nGreater resilience <em>can<\/em> be cultivated with practice! Here are <strong>4 resilience-building strategies <\/strong>for you to consider:\r\n\r\n<strong>Grow Your Mind<\/strong>\r\n\r\nWe can look at the bigger picture by viewing things from a broader, \u201cpanoramic\u201d perspective, not a narrow \u201czoom\u201d mode. Remembering that this experience is a moment in time, we can use it to look for opportunities for learning and growth. Practice building a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset.\r\n\r\n[caption id=\"attachment_206\" align=\"aligncenter\" width=\"640\"]<a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset.png\"><img class=\"wp-image-206 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"633\" \/><\/a> Figure 24.2 Growth Mindset[\/caption]\r\n\r\nHave you heard of the old saying \u201cyou can\u2019t teach an old dog new tricks\u201d? Science shows us that you\u00a0<em>can<\/em>\u00a0indeed teach an \u201cold dog\u201d new tricks. Through the power of neuroplasticity, we can reconceptualize our world and rewire our brains in order to be a lifelong learner with the ability to change our behaviors.[footnote]Psychology Today. (2023). Neuroplasticity. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/basics\/neuroplasticity[\/footnote] This enables us to look at things as they are so that we can respond thoughtfully and deliberately to our experiences.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-header\">\r\n<div class=\"textbox textbox--key-takeaways\"><header class=\"textbox__header\">\r\n<p class=\"textbox__title\" style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>Tips to Maximize Your Neuroplastic Potential<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n<\/header>\r\n<div class=\"textbox__content\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-body\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-body-fraction h5p-text\">\r\n\r\nChoose something new to you that you would like to learn. Key components for neuroplasticity to occur is that it needs to be something new that is challenging and rewarding for you to engage in. It's important to repeat the skill or task often and focus on learning it.\r\nBeing patient is key! Neuroplastic changes do take time, but before you know it you will notice positive incremental steps towards achieving your goal.\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\">\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\r\n<div style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>Resiliency Reflection<\/strong><\/div>\r\n<div><\/div>\r\n<div>The following gives you an opportunity to reflect on your resilience. You can type in your answers if you'd like, and download the document at the end by clicking on the blue arrow.<\/div>\r\n<div><\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\"><\/div>\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\">\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\"><code>[h5p id=\"2\"]<\/code><\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<strong>Prioritize Relationships<\/strong>\r\n\r\nConnect with understanding, trustworthy, and compassionate people. Some people drain you and others provide soul food. Get in the company of those who feed your spirit!\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n[caption id=\"attachment_200\" align=\"aligncenter\" width=\"1024\"]<a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely..png\"><img class=\"wp-image-200 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-1024x683.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"683\" \/><\/a> Figure 24.3 Pick Them Wisely[\/caption]\r\n\r\nYou\u2019ve heard a lot about the <strong>fight, flight, or freeze<\/strong> response to stress, but have you heard of the \u201c<strong>tend and befriend<\/strong>\u201d stress response? \u00a0Research suggests that during stressful situations, humans rely on taking care of loved ones and connecting with others.[footnote]Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf[\/footnote] When we care for others, it stimulates our brain with feelings of connection, empathy and trust. It increases motivation and optimism, inhibits fear, and protects against the harmful effects of stress.[footnote]Thannhauser, J. (2022). Four Practices to Boost Your Resiliency. Epoch Health. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.theepochtimes.com\/health\/four-practices-to-boost-your-resiliency_4259420.html[\/footnote]This doesn\u2019t have to mean you have to take the time to volunteer somewhere, it could also mean simply supporting a friend in their own time of need. Remember that helping others doesn\u2019t mean you set yourself on fire, but if you have the capacity to do so, it can help you nurture self-worth and a feeling of purpose.\r\n\r\n<strong>Clarifying Priorities and Setting Goals<\/strong>\r\n\r\nSlow. Down. Develop a realistic goal and do something achievable, even if it seems like a small accomplishment. Ask yourself \u201cif I was able to focus on one thing only, what would that be?\u201d \u00a0\u201cIf I could add a second thing, what would that be?\u201d \u00a0As you build your capacity, you can add even more items.\r\n\r\nHave you heard of <strong>SMART Goals<\/strong>? When setting goals, make sure it follows the SMART structure. The questions below can be used to create your goals.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n[caption id=\"attachment_330\" align=\"aligncenter\" width=\"791\"]<a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1.png\"><img class=\"wp-image-330 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-791x1024.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"791\" height=\"1024\" \/><\/a> Figure 24.4 Smart Goals[\/caption]\r\n\r\n<strong>Keep Things In Perspective<\/strong>\r\n\r\nTry to embrace a realistic way of thinking rather than catastrophizing things that happen. You may not be able to change something stressful that happens to you, but you <em>can<\/em> change how you interpret and react to it. Understand that change is a part of life, and by accepting situations that cannot be changed it can help you reimagine those that can. Being resilient doesn\u2019t mean you have to be happy all the time and avoid pain and sadness. These are normal parts of a human existence. Focus on gratitude. Thinking about things we are grateful for reinforces our positiveness, improves our mood and helps us to cope with challenges.\r\n\r\nUse the following to reflect on your perspective on events in your life.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\r\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\"><code>[h5p id=\"3\"]<\/code><\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n<div>\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\n<\/div>","rendered":"<p>Before we can delve into the practice of self-care, we must understand what resiliency is. <strong>Resilience<\/strong> means being able to care for ourselves so we can also care for others. Resiliency is being flexible and engaging in effective coping mechanisms during everyday challenges or major life stressors. . These can be incidences ranging from having a bad day to those that have a lasting impact such as a serious illness, the death of someone you love or a terrible accident. Everyone has their own threshold of resilience and the ability to \u201cbounce back\u201d from adversity by being flexible in adjusting to change. Some people\u2019s \u201cstraw that broke the camel\u2019s back\u201d occurs sooner than others.<\/p>\n<p><em>Stressful events don\u2019t have to define the outcome of how your life unfolds \u2013 increased resiliency can help you get through difficult circumstances and empower you to experience personal growth during various moments in your life.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>What qualities would a resilient individual likely have?<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Tends to have a positive view<\/li>\n<li>Has a hopeful outlook<\/li>\n<li>Views change as a challenge<\/li>\n<li>Has a healthy emotional attachment to others<\/li>\n<li>Has a sense of humor<\/li>\n<li>Has a sense of personal competence<\/li>\n<li>Has a sense of self-compassion<\/li>\n<li>Takes opportunities for physical activity<\/li>\n<li>Asks for help<\/li>\n<li>Utilize problem solving and thinking of different ways to see situations<\/li>\n<li>Has effective coping strategies<\/li>\n<li>Manages emotions and impulses<\/li>\n<li>Is focused on the present<\/li>\n<li>Is able to identify realistic plans and steps<a class=\"footnote\" title=\"Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf\" id=\"return-footnote-86-1\" href=\"#footnote-86-1\" aria-label=\"Footnote 1\"><sup class=\"footnote\">[1]<\/sup><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_204\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-204\" style=\"width: 1024px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-204 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"768\" srcset=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE.png 1024w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE-300x225.png 300w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE-768x576.png 768w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE-65x49.png 65w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE-225x169.png 225w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/RESILIENCE-350x263.png 350w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-204\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Figure 24.1 Resilience<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<div class=\"textbox shaded\">\n<p><span style=\"color: #ff0000\">Resiliency is NOT\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u2026never feeling impacted by negative things<\/p>\n<p>\u2026never feeling stress, anxiety, or anger<\/p>\n<p>\u2026a trait you\u2019re born with<\/p>\n<p>\u2026fixed for life<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Greater resilience <em>can<\/em> be cultivated with practice! Here are <strong>4 resilience-building strategies <\/strong>for you to consider:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Grow Your Mind<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>We can look at the bigger picture by viewing things from a broader, \u201cpanoramic\u201d perspective, not a narrow \u201czoom\u201d mode. Remembering that this experience is a moment in time, we can use it to look for opportunities for learning and growth. Practice building a growth mindset, not a fixed mindset.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_206\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-206\" style=\"width: 640px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-206 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"633\" srcset=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset.png 640w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset-300x297.png 300w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset-65x64.png 65w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset-225x223.png 225w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/growth-mindset-350x346.png 350w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-206\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Figure 24.2 Growth Mindset<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Have you heard of the old saying \u201cyou can\u2019t teach an old dog new tricks\u201d? Science shows us that you\u00a0<em>can<\/em>\u00a0indeed teach an \u201cold dog\u201d new tricks. Through the power of neuroplasticity, we can reconceptualize our world and rewire our brains in order to be a lifelong learner with the ability to change our behaviors.<a class=\"footnote\" title=\"Psychology Today. (2023). Neuroplasticity. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/basics\/neuroplasticity\" id=\"return-footnote-86-2\" href=\"#footnote-86-2\" aria-label=\"Footnote 2\"><sup class=\"footnote\">[2]<\/sup><\/a> This enables us to look at things as they are so that we can respond thoughtfully and deliberately to our experiences.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-header\">\n<div class=\"textbox textbox--key-takeaways\">\n<header class=\"textbox__header\">\n<p class=\"textbox__title\" style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>Tips to Maximize Your Neuroplastic Potential<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/header>\n<div class=\"textbox__content\">\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-body\">\n<div class=\"h5p-image-hotspot-popup-body-fraction h5p-text\">\n<p>Choose something new to you that you would like to learn. Key components for neuroplasticity to occur is that it needs to be something new that is challenging and rewarding for you to engage in. It&#8217;s important to repeat the skill or task often and focus on learning it.<br \/>\nBeing patient is key! Neuroplastic changes do take time, but before you know it you will notice positive incremental steps towards achieving your goal.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\">\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\n<div style=\"text-align: center\"><strong>Resiliency Reflection<\/strong><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div>The following gives you an opportunity to reflect on your resilience. You can type in your answers if you&#8217;d like, and download the document at the end by clicking on the blue arrow.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\">\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\"><code><\/p>\n<div id=\"h5p-2\">\n<div class=\"h5p-iframe-wrapper\"><iframe id=\"h5p-iframe-2\" class=\"h5p-iframe\" data-content-id=\"2\" style=\"height:1px\" src=\"about:blank\" frameBorder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" title=\"Resilience Reflection\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/code><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>Prioritize Relationships<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Connect with understanding, trustworthy, and compassionate people. Some people drain you and others provide soul food. Get in the company of those who feed your spirit!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_200\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-200\" style=\"width: 1024px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely..png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-200 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-1024x683.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"1024\" height=\"683\" srcset=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-1024x683.png 1024w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-300x200.png 300w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-768x512.png 768w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-1536x1024.png 1536w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-65x43.png 65w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-225x150.png 225w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely.-350x233.png 350w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/People-inspire-you-or-they-drain-you.-Pick-them-wisely..png 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-200\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Figure 24.3 Pick Them Wisely<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>You\u2019ve heard a lot about the <strong>fight, flight, or freeze<\/strong> response to stress, but have you heard of the \u201c<strong>tend and befriend<\/strong>\u201d stress response? \u00a0Research suggests that during stressful situations, humans rely on taking care of loved ones and connecting with others.<a class=\"footnote\" title=\"Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf\" id=\"return-footnote-86-3\" href=\"#footnote-86-3\" aria-label=\"Footnote 3\"><sup class=\"footnote\">[3]<\/sup><\/a> When we care for others, it stimulates our brain with feelings of connection, empathy and trust. It increases motivation and optimism, inhibits fear, and protects against the harmful effects of stress.<a class=\"footnote\" title=\"Thannhauser, J. (2022). Four Practices to Boost Your Resiliency. Epoch Health. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.theepochtimes.com\/health\/four-practices-to-boost-your-resiliency_4259420.html\" id=\"return-footnote-86-4\" href=\"#footnote-86-4\" aria-label=\"Footnote 4\"><sup class=\"footnote\">[4]<\/sup><\/a>This doesn\u2019t have to mean you have to take the time to volunteer somewhere, it could also mean simply supporting a friend in their own time of need. Remember that helping others doesn\u2019t mean you set yourself on fire, but if you have the capacity to do so, it can help you nurture self-worth and a feeling of purpose.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Clarifying Priorities and Setting Goals<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Slow. Down. Develop a realistic goal and do something achievable, even if it seems like a small accomplishment. Ask yourself \u201cif I was able to focus on one thing only, what would that be?\u201d \u00a0\u201cIf I could add a second thing, what would that be?\u201d \u00a0As you build your capacity, you can add even more items.<\/p>\n<p>Have you heard of <strong>SMART Goals<\/strong>? When setting goals, make sure it follows the SMART structure. The questions below can be used to create your goals.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_330\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-330\" style=\"width: 791px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-330 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-791x1024.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"791\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-791x1024.png 791w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-232x300.png 232w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-768x994.png 768w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-1187x1536.png 1187w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-65x84.png 65w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-225x291.png 225w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1-350x453.png 350w, https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1868\/2023\/01\/smart-goals-1.png 1545w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 791px) 100vw, 791px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-330\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Figure 24.4 Smart Goals<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>Keep Things In Perspective<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Try to embrace a realistic way of thinking rather than catastrophizing things that happen. You may not be able to change something stressful that happens to you, but you <em>can<\/em> change how you interpret and react to it. Understand that change is a part of life, and by accepting situations that cannot be changed it can help you reimagine those that can. Being resilient doesn\u2019t mean you have to be happy all the time and avoid pain and sadness. These are normal parts of a human existence. Focus on gratitude. Thinking about things we are grateful for reinforces our positiveness, improves our mood and helps us to cope with challenges.<\/p>\n<p>Use the following to reflect on your perspective on events in your life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div class=\"postbox h5p-sidebar\">\n<div class=\"h5p-action-bar-settings h5p-panel\"><code><\/p>\n<div id=\"h5p-3\">\n<div class=\"h5p-iframe-wrapper\"><iframe id=\"h5p-iframe-3\" class=\"h5p-iframe\" data-content-id=\"3\" style=\"height:1px\" src=\"about:blank\" frameBorder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" title=\"Perspective Reflection\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/code><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"media-attributions clear\" prefix:cc=\"http:\/\/creativecommons.org\/ns#\" prefix:dc=\"http:\/\/purl.org\/dc\/terms\/\"><h2>Media Attributions<\/h2><ul><li >Figure 24.1 Resilience  &copy;  Jody Vaughan    is licensed under a  <a rel=\"license\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/4.0\/\">CC BY-SA (Attribution ShareAlike)<\/a> license<\/li><li >Figure 24.2 Growth Mindset  &copy;  Jody Vaughan    is licensed under a  <a rel=\"license\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/4.0\/\">CC BY-SA (Attribution ShareAlike)<\/a> license<\/li><li >Figure 24.3 Pick Them Wisely  &copy;  Jody Vaughan    is licensed under a  <a rel=\"license\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/4.0\/\">CC BY-SA (Attribution ShareAlike)<\/a> license<\/li><li >Figure 24.4 Smart Goals  &copy;  Jody Vaughan  <a rel=\"dc:source\" href=\"https:\/\/www.mindtools.com\/a4wo118\/smart-goals\"><\/a>  is licensed under a  <a rel=\"license\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-sa\/4.0\/\">CC BY-SA (Attribution ShareAlike)<\/a> license<\/li><\/ul><\/div><hr class=\"before-footnotes clear\" \/><div class=\"footnotes\"><ol><li id=\"footnote-86-1\">Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf <a href=\"#return-footnote-86-1\" class=\"return-footnote\" aria-label=\"Return to footnote 1\">&crarr;<\/a><\/li><li id=\"footnote-86-2\">Psychology Today. (2023). Neuroplasticity. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.psychologytoday.com\/us\/basics\/neuroplasticity <a href=\"#return-footnote-86-2\" class=\"return-footnote\" aria-label=\"Return to footnote 2\">&crarr;<\/a><\/li><li id=\"footnote-86-3\">Taylor, S., Klein, L., Lewis, B., Gruenewald, T., Gurung, R., Updegraff, J. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-Befriend, not Fight-or-Flight. American Psychological Association. Psychological Review. 107(3) 411-429 Retrieved from: https:\/\/scholar.harvard.edu\/marianabockarova\/files\/tend-and-befriend.pdf <a href=\"#return-footnote-86-3\" class=\"return-footnote\" aria-label=\"Return to footnote 3\">&crarr;<\/a><\/li><li id=\"footnote-86-4\">Thannhauser, J. (2022). Four Practices to Boost Your Resiliency. Epoch Health. Retrieved from: https:\/\/www.theepochtimes.com\/health\/four-practices-to-boost-your-resiliency_4259420.html <a href=\"#return-footnote-86-4\" class=\"return-footnote\" aria-label=\"Return to footnote 4\">&crarr;<\/a><\/li><\/ol><\/div>","protected":false},"author":1861,"menu_order":2,"template":"","meta":{"pb_show_title":"on","pb_short_title":"","pb_subtitle":"","pb_authors":[],"pb_section_license":""},"chapter-type":[49],"contributor":[],"license":[],"class_list":["post-86","chapter","type-chapter","status-web-only","hentry","chapter-type-numberless"],"part":59,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/86","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/chapter"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1861"}],"version-history":[{"count":25,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/86\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1121,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/86\/revisions\/1121"}],"part":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/parts\/59"}],"metadata":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/86\/metadata\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=86"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"chapter-type","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapter-type?post=86"},{"taxonomy":"contributor","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/contributor?post=86"},{"taxonomy":"license","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pressbooks.bccampus.ca\/rebootyourresiliencywithselfcare\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/license?post=86"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}