Content Warning: Readers are advised that discussions may include references to sexuality, consensual non-normative sexual practices, and their intersections with trans* identities that some may find sensitive or triggering. Reader discretion is advised.

“Over dumplings, Evie said that the Japanese word for having an orgasm is iku, but iku actually means to go somewhere. So, while on one continent our lovers come, on the other side of the world, our lovers go. Held in the hands of lovers who make the world feel smaller, I’m coming into myself and beginning to go somewhere new.”

-Transland, p. 55.

Introduction

Transland: Consent, Kink & Pleasure (2023) is a memoir by Mx. Sly, a non-binary writer, performer, arts producer, and flight attendant (Sly, n.d.). Sly beautifully illustrates encounters during their time in BDSM/kink communities, in which they delve into understanding their own gender articulation, sense of belonging, and “testing the limits of sensual experience” (Sly, 2023a, back cover).

Transland exemplifies the disruption of cultural intelligibility’s bounds, a concept introduced by Judith Butler in Gender Trouble (1990) and further in Bodies that Matter (1993). Its alignment with “open normativities”, or the “challenging of homogeneity in the “transnormative narrative”” (Shotwell, 2012, as cited in Vipond, 2018, pp. 21, 33, 36) is apparent in its illustrated transsubjectivity at the cross sections of namely gender non-conforming identity and non-normative sexuality practices.

(Un)intelligibility & Trans* Life Writing

Evan Vipond offers the concept of becoming culturally (un)intelligible in trans* life writing. According to Vipond, hegemonic trans* narratives—those that align with dominant cultural norms—often emerge from the systemic pressures to meet the expectations of cisgender audiences, ensuring cultural intelligibility. These narratives are shaped by the constraints of legibility, some being the use of recognisable language, repetition, and linear timeline frameworks in storytelling. Such strategies resonate with mainstream audiences (predominantly cisgender and heterosexual) and provide access to legitimacy, which, within the perception of dominant culture, is equated with cultural intelligibility (2018, pp. 19–36).

Trans* life writers are often pigeonholed into constructing this ‘coherent narrative’ to gain the capital associated with being regarded as ‘real’ —or the ability to pass within dominant culture as their experienced gender. However, trans* persons who do not pass, and in turn are not regarded as ‘real’, are deemed culturally unintelligible because they are not legible to dominant culture, and in trans* life writing, its dominant audiences (Vipond, 2018). In this view then, culturally intelligible trans* life writers are revered for their instrumentality, usually as a result of diluting, or omitting topics that are ‘hard to conceptualise’ in their storytelling for the sake of being legitimized (Shahjahan, 2019, p. 791) to fit a mould that realistically not all trans* persons fit. Building on this view, non-binary people that consider themselves to exist within the trans* galaxy would be perceived as culturally unintelligible with their departure from the cisnormative binary (that being, ‘female’ or ‘male’) system of gender expression, and subsequent life writing.

Through Transland by Mx. Sly, I’d like to begin a discussion regarding the simultaneously joyful and repercussive resistance in embracing cultural unintelligibility within trans* life writing and the kink community. I will illustrate how Transland exemplifies the culturally unintelligible intersection between non-binary identity and kink through Sly’s written narrative surrounding play spaces and practice as fantastical pathways to self exploration and expression.

(Un)intelligibility & Non-Normative Sexual Practice

Intelligibility relies on its proximity to whiteness (Vipond, 2018, pp. 21, 25), and in turn the structures that uphold whiteness, like that of the cisheteropatriarchy (that is: the cisgender, heterosexual patriarchy). Following this understanding, sexual practices that exist outside of heteronormative binary sexualities (e.g. communities forming around kink subcultures) misalign with cultural intelligibility by virtue of non-normative practices falling outside of a cisheteropatriarchial purity and respectability (Skidmore, 2011, p. 276, as cited in Vipond, 2018, p. 35). This is further supported in Vipond’s reading of gender non-conforming writer, performer and activist Kate Bornstein’s “anti-autobiographical” (and accordingly culturally unintelligible) Gender Outlaw (1994), in that: “As a practitioner of sadomasochism, Bornstein [also] refuses to capitulate to heteronormative, middle-class respectability” (Vipond, 2018, p. 35). This aligns with depictions of kink practices explored by a gender non-conforming persons in Transland.

Kink spaces and practices act as a pathway to self-expression outside the bounds of cultural intelligibility, involving avenues for gendered and non-gendered expression and articulation in a multitude of flavours. Across Transland, Sly discusses encounters in play spaces akin to self-exploration within kink, and consequently outside what is deemed culturally intelligible: “kink is a way to subvert the existing power dynamics of society in order to imagine other ways of being” (2023a, p. 120).

The Magic of Space

With the establishment of valid ethical consent between participating parties —meaning it is informed, voluntary and competent (Bullock, 2020, pp. 85-94)— a trusting dynamic can be created. Through the concept of “consent as magic” which reframes typically “immoral actions into moral ones” (Archard et al., 2020, pp. 174-184), space is created for fantasy, allowing ethical play to ensue. Play spaces, like dungeons used for BDSM practices (with acronym subsections depicted in the diagram above) have the ability to transform; Trans scholar, activist and artist Susan Stryker in “Dungeon Intimacies: The Poetics of Transsexual Sadomasochism” describes this as an act of artistic creation—a poesis—when trans* persons exist in dungeon spaces and practice sadomasochism (2008, p. 39). The enacting of poesis breaks down the barriers separating: “the embodied self, its world, and others”, allowing for composition of “specific place” in their crossover (Stryker. 2008, p. 39). This sort of fluidity between play space, practice and practitioners is further referenced by Stryker through Bachelard’s The Poetics of Space (1994) as a blurring between the “‘duality of subject and object’” that becomes “‘iridescent, shimmering, unceasingly active in its inversions’” (Stryker, 2008, p. 39). Sly’s sentiments reflect something comparable to the creation of poesis and the liminality (and accompanying buzzing potential in shared transformation) of play spaces: “We who search for ourselves and for our place in the world come and go from these settings, while the setting itself barely notices” (2023a, p. 114). This sort of ‘place’ does not come about in a way that is ‘tangible’, or easily comprehensible by dominant audiences or culture, and as such does not exist within intelligible bounds for transnormative narratives or normative sexuality. Yet such concepts hold space in Stryker’s and Sly’s descriptions in their self reflection and storytelling. The meaning attached to these types of spaces for gender non-conforming individuals is not singular or uniform, highlighting a missed opportunity for greater nuance in trans* life writing which is often not captured in conventional storytelling due to factors like safety and the demands of legibility.

The Magic of Practice

In addition to play space, Stryker remarks on Bachelard’s interest in “reiterative temporal practices –habitual movements– through which we inhabit those sites”, with particular focus on the “fluctuating movement between the ‘real’ and the ‘unreal’ whose dynamic interlacings produce the shimmering iridescence of poetic reverie, or common daydreaming” (2008, p. 39). Particular practices and their practitioners in kink/BDSM dynamics can allow for this stepping into a reality beyond what is intelligible that Sly illustrates in Transland through most notably rope bondage.
Sly’s enacts intelligibility-challenging storytelling through what they describe in an interview about their memoir as the employment of magic (Sly, 2023b, 34:44), and touch (Sly, 2023b, 44:23). Particularly, Sly employs magical and sensorial storytelling in various descriptions of rope bondage scenes —planned and consensual interactions between participating parties— for both gendered and non-gendered self exploration and expression, which harmonise with the idea of blurring between the “duality of subject and object” (Belchard, 1994, as cited by Stryker, 2008, p. 39). Sly allocates considerable attention to describing the delight of jute rope (pictured above) against the skin and body as “the universe reminding me where I came from” (2023, p. 37), and the resulting feelings of interconnectedness between the rope as your immediate world, your embodied self, and the person who is tying you, composing a sort of “specific space” (Stryker. 2008, p. 39) within a rigger (the person tying)/rope bottom (the person being tied) dynamic. Sly expresses in Transland that: “When tied, I am very aware of how connected everything is—in the body, between the body and the mind, between the mind and the eternal, and between the eternal and ecstasy.” (2023, p. 37), and that “Rope reframes everything.” (2023, p. 37).

Who Gets Access?

Conversations surrounding cultural intelligibility in trans* life writing and non-normative sexual practices as a gender non-conforming person opens the door to a lot of topics, but cannot go without the recognition of pleasure politics; Who gets to have access to pleasure? Especially when communities that form around non-normative sexual practices can allow for a spectrum of gendered and non-gendered personal exploration and expression. While its problems do not negate its potential for innovative transformation, exploration and expression, kink communities are not immune to exclusionary “rules, expectations, and hierarchies” (Sly, 2023a, back cover) mimicking limitations in mainstream society. Sly remarks on this in BDSM communities: “When a subculture is built around the idea of being shunned and shamed by mainstream society, popular figures in that community become synonymous with the subculture itself. It makes it hard to critique or call out abusive behaviour because it is seen as a betrayal or an attack on the subculture as a whole.” (Sly 2023a, p. 159). Kink community discourse should celebrate the fostering of connection in all of its facets but also reflect on what could be at stake for the sake of community cohesion, and what this can do to accessibility to pleasure and said connection.

Joyful Resistance

These brief scene excerpts showcased from Sly’s memoir do not privilege the narrative structures equivalent to intelligibility for readers, and instead fall into a natural resistance of mainstream understandings of legibility by centering the documentation of joy in sexual exploration unabashedly. This type of joy is visually captured in Dematerialisation by “Bird” (personal communication, December 3, 2024). While detailing aspects of their gender articulation through non-normative sexual practices is explored throughout Transland, Sly’s storytelling does not snap back to narrativising their own personal embodiment of their gender with every single opportunity for the sake of ‘making themselves clear’ as a trans* life writer.

Extending from Shajahan’s article, “On being for others’: time and shame in the neoliberal academy”, one could parallel conceptualisations of dominant temporalities in neoliberal academia with intelligibility in trans* life writing. Narrative structures akin to temporality as linear and outcome-oriented (Shahjahan, 2019, p. 793)—that is, clearly progressing in one direction (e.g. reduction to before and after “coming out” or “growing up” (Vipond, 2019, pp. 21, 36)) with a predictable ending (e.g. physically embodying “the gender you always knew you were”)—perpetuate a “Being for Others” existence that expectedly precipitates disconnect from personal authenticity for the sake of legitimised authenticity (Vipond, 2019, p. 24; Shahjahan, 2019, pp. 787-788) in contributing to neoliberal performativity in trans* life writing as part of academia or culture more broadly. In our case, this extends to a ‘legible’, clear-cut, ‘unmessy’ representation of self as per Vipond’s sentiments (2018, pp. 20-24), which we can apply here to Mx. Sly and Transland.

Conclusion

Transland by Mx. Sly provides a beautiful illustration of what I consider to be joyful resistance to cultural intelligibility in trans* life writing within the arena of non-normative sexual practice and subsequent self exploration and expression. Sly’s storytelling illuminates the magic of kink space and practice while documenting the navigation of these subcultures as a non-binary person through a rightfully critical lens. Even communities that exist beyond cultural intelligibility are not immune to their own set of pitfalls paralleling exclusion in mainstream society and normative culture. As such, joyful resistance to cultural intelligibility in both written accounts and existence more broadly do not come without simultaneous repercussive elements, especially for trans* persons.

Acknowledgements

This research was conducted on the traditional, ancestral, and unceded territories of the xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), and səlilwətaɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) Nations. Visit https://www.whose.land/en/ to learn about the land you reside on.

I’d like to thank Dr. Isabel Machado for her mentorship and guidance in the development of this research, my mom for supporting and believing in me, and my dear friend, “Bird” for their beautiful artwork and conversation.

Notes

1. 1. Note on the use of  “Trans*” versus “Trans”: Trans* (with an asterisk) has been used historically to acknowledge identities aligning with trans as an identifier that exist outside the binary in a multitude of ways, and to generally be more inclusive to a wider variety of experiences that may be taken into consideration for the topics discussed in this essay. I use trans (without an asterisk) when I am referring to narrower contexts such as direct quotations.
   2. The illustrated “‘being for others’ and temporality mirror” diagram in Shajahan’s article (2019b, p.788) is a helpful metaphorical visual aid in understanding the politics surrounding the existential (the awareness of being) and embodied (the physical/corporeal being) self, and could be broadened to represent an individual’s dissonance in selfhood. Specifically, between the maintenance of cultural intelligibility (or “Being for Others”), which is sustained by an institution, concept, or idea (in place of “Academics” as a label in this figure) that exists under dominant normative structures, and the internal self (or “Being for the Self”, which is done with the simultaneous repercussions and joy of resistance).
   3. Due to a limited word count, I cannot go into as much detail as I would like in regards to accessibility in the kink community. However, I reflect on the history of leathermen prioritising ritual, tradition and protocol as a means of community and cultural preservation, especially during times of heightened vulnerability (e.g. the AIDS epidemic). While undoubtedly important, the preservation upheld by leathermen in kink came with the establishment of inclusion boundaries and hierarchy that, while with exceptions, left vulnerable individuals —including trans* persons— on the margins. A group of leathermen discuss the past, present, and future of the kink community with a trans community member (On Guard, 2023) providing important first hand dialogue about this evolution.
   4.  As a means of engaging ethical citation practices detailed in “How do you wish to be cited?” (Thieme & Saunders, 2018), I’ve tried to include excerpts from Transland and other sources by trans* persons that I felt are appropriate for contextualising their works, while remaining mindful of scholarly care in harm reduction. While this source has worked mostly in the background of this essay’s creation, it has been crucial in my writing as a cisgender author on trans* topics.
   5. Trans bodies, Trans selves (Erickson-Schroth, 2022) discusses sexuality with a chapter introduction paralleling discussions surrounding cultural intelligibility. It details how sex-related information tends to centre cisgender heterosexual audiences which can cause trans* people, like everyone, to “internalize and believe implicit messages about the kinds of sex we are “supposed” to be having” (p. 719). Along with detailing different aspects of the intersection between sexuality and transness, what really struck me in this chapter was explaining embodiment as the opposite of dissociation (p. 738), and how this conversation could be a meaningful continuation of the magic of space and practice in kink for trans* persons as a way of exploring different pathways to embodiment, which I believe strengthens the joyful potential in its practice for gender and non-gendered exploration and expression.

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