CONTENT WARNING: Photos and videos in this essay include full nudity.

In the video above, Amanda Lepore is seen fully covering her naked body in bright pink M.A.C. lipstick. Done in collaboration with the Heatherette^[1] and M.A.C. cosmetics, it is described by Lepore as her favorite piece of her performance art career (Siemsen, 2017). It’s campy, sexy, and show-stopping, illustrative of Lepore’s^[2] life and career which has been filled with fabulous, over-the-top, and naked adventures as a Club Kid,^[3] performance artist, model, singer, dominatrix, and, in her own words, “number one transexual”. Many of these adventures are chronicled in her memoir, Doll Parts (2017).^[4]

Despite the conformity of the first half of Doll Parts (2017) to Heyam’s (2022) “mad-lib” narrative format, the second half covers Lepore’s adult life and follows her to New York City after she runs away from her abusive husband, where she works as a dominatrix, joins the iconic ranks of the Club Kids, and woos a long list of gorgeous men, to name a few of the many stories she tells.

In this paper, I argue that Amanda Lepore’s Doll Parts (2017) defies the “mad- libs” trans narrative by rejecting respectability politics as she refuses to follow the script of what trans women should want in their adulthood, expectations that delineate which trans women are deserving of respect. As Black queer feminist activist and scholar Cathy Cohen explains, this type of deviance from norms can be understood as a legitimate avenue for social change (p. 33).

“I had sold myself short with my marriage”: Rejecting Domesticity

Lepore rejects what Black historian Evelyn Brooks Higgenbotham (1993) calls politics of respectability and therefore the “mad-libs” trans narrative through her resistance to domesticity. Women, especially trans women, are expected to be domestic, find a husband, and disappear into the private sphere. Historian Emily Skidmore illustrates that by presenting themselves as domestic, such as through marriage, trans women’s conformity to norms of (white) womanhood allows them to be culturally accepted as women (p. 271).

For example, Christine Jorgensen’s^[5] profile in a 1953 issue of American Weekly included photos of her and her mother cooking together (see above) (Jorgensen, 1953, p. 5), implying the passing down of wifely or motherly duties to Jorgensen as a sign of her integration. The conformity to this assimilationist expectation grants respectability to these trans women but also further entrenches  expectations of domesticity as one of the few means by which trans women can gain respect and acceptance. In a 2009 interview, Lepore explicitly rejected the expectation that trans women should strive for domestic assimilation, explaining that in the past trans women “[wanted] to blend in […] it was more about meeting a straight man and getting married” and clarified that she “was the opposite of that” (Azzopardi, 2009, p. 29).

Lepore defies this aspect of trans respectability politics through highlighting her divorce and subsequent decentering of romantic relationships in Doll Parts’ (2017) narrative. When Lepore leaves her husband, she explains that she “realized I had sold myself short with my marriage” (Lepore & Flannery, 2017, p. 140). Here we see a departure from the expectation that trans women, in order to be respected, need to find a husband and settle down. Instead, Lepore saw something different for herself, framing a domestic life as wrong for her.

Lepore left her husband by running away to New York where she spends the rest of the memoir focusing on herself and her career. In fact, in Doll Parts (2017), Lepore’s growing up/coming into her own is framed through her realization that she actually didn’t have to live a domestic, private life; she could go off and live mostly in the limelight (rather than at home) with little mention of men, other than as arm candy (as demonstrated to the left) or sexual partners. This picture is quite stark compared to how Jorgensen is represented above. This is a clear rejection of the expectation that trans women need to strive for a respectable, invisible existence by settling down into domestic life.

“How happy I am to be transsexual”: Embracing Queerness

Lepore’s rejection of heterosexual domesticity in Doll Parts (2017) is complemented by her wholehearted embracing of queerness. This challenges poltics of respectability for trans women, who are expected to distance themselves from queerness in order to assimilate into cishetero womanhood. Law scholar Yuvraj Joshi explains that what he calls “queer respectability” within dominant society relies on hiding actual queer practice in private spaces (p. 415). As respectability politics largely relies on appeals to dominant conceptions of morality (Brooks Higginbotham, 1993, p. 187), queer people are only seen as respectable when they present a palatable, conformist self in the public eye. This expectation is seen in practice through Christine Jorgensen, who was able to gain mainstream acceptance as a respectable woman by “illustrating her repulsion to homosexuality” (Skidmore, 2011, p. 277). In order to be taken seriously and respected by dominant cishet culture, trans women need to distance themselves from queerness and associate with heterosexual standards. While Lepore is seemingly heterosexual, she makes no effort to distance herself from. This puts her mainstream acceptance at risk. Thankfully, the acceptance of cishet people seems to be entirely uninteresting to Lepore.

Doll Parts (2017) highlights Lepore thriving in explicitly queer spaces. This is most clear in the many chapters spent chronicling her time as one of the Club Kids (pictured above). Lepore’s job as a nightlife celebrity in mostly queer clubs (Lepore & Flannery, 2017, p. 167) is framed as an exciting and promising venue for Lepore’s ambition, especially in stark contrast to the banality and depression that mark her descriptions of her marriage. In a 2024 interview, Lepore reflected on her place as a queer role model given her influence in New York’s queer scene, explaining that “It’s such an honor and a privilege” (Brandon, 2024). Her allegiance to  queerness is also clear in the fact that she does not feel the need to state her sexuality at any point in Doll Parts (2017), neglecting to associate herself directly with heterosexuality despite only textually expressing desire for men. Lepore’s time spent on her queer night club work in Doll Parts (2017), and her reflections on her role in the queer community defy expectations of heterosexual conformity.

The above video exemplifies not only the essence of the Club Kids, but Lepore’s disregard for conformity to respectability politics. In fact, Lepore draws explicit attention to this interview in Doll Parts (2017). She explains that “Joan wanted nothing to do with us until the cameras were on” (166). Lepore presents herself explicitly as a member of the Club Kids, as one of “us,” contrasting the group to Joan, a cishet woman. Lepore’s association with queer culture and separation from cishet culture is unambiguous as she rejects the construction of a ‘respectable’ image in the interview. While Lepore explains that she dresses as a male fantasy and embodies many aspects of white womanhood that are central to the respectable trans woman (Skidmore, 2011), she rejects the version of heterosexuality that is tied up in trans respectability politics as she is far from domestic and cishet.^[6] The Club Kids explain that they just want to look good and have fun; a far cry from the expected goals of “respectable” young straight people. The flamboyant appearance and attitude of the group are on full display in the photo above. Lepore’s presence in this interview, and her subsequent attention to this instance in Doll Parts (2017) illustrates Lepore’s rejection of any expectation to assimilate into cishet society.

“Being a dominatrix was a great career”: Defying Modesty

Finally, Lepore resists respectability in her memoir through an emphasis on her sexuality. This challenges the undesirable and nonsexual image that garners mainstream acceptance and is seen as most deserving of respect for trans women. Skidmore (2011) explains that the construction of an acceptable trans woman in the media included adherence to dominant norms of sexuality (p. 277). She explains that this was notably done by Christine Jorgensen who disparaged prostitution which “served to assure readers that her public presence was not motivated by a political agenda seeking to challenge the sanctity of heteropatriarchy” (p. 277). Jorgensen was able to be seen as respectable by conforming to dominant morals regarding sexuality, and in doing so established a norm of trans respectability as separated from overt sexuality. Joshi elaborates on the exclusion of sex and overt sexuality from conceptions of respectability, arguing that as sexuality and sex are considered to be private and have “no place within a respectable public sphere,” queer sexuality is pushed further out of public life. For queer people at large, and for trans women specifically, being openly sexual is not compatible with a politics of respectability that seeks mainstream acceptance through appeals to dominant cishet morals.

Lepore also disregards norms of trans women’s sexual expression in Doll Parts (2017) by exploring her time as a dominatrix. When Lepore first moved to New York City, she got a job as a dominatrix at a dungeon. She states that “being a dominatrix was a great career for me: it was easy work and the money was fantastic” (Lepore & Flannery, 2017, p. 148). She spends most of chapter 7 on this job, and while some of it is certainly presented as scary (such as when her coworker was murdered by a client), she presents her time at the dungeon as overall positive, including have a long-lasting friendship with the woman who ran the dungeon. The visibility given to sex work, and the mostly positive experience that Lepore had as a dominatrix is far from the type of modest, heterosexuality that would garner any type of normative respectability. Additionally, Lepore has not attempted to hide her past as a sex worker, highlighting it in not only her memoir but in her photographic work with LaChapelle, and continues to draw on sexual and kink imagery in her photos (as seen to the above). Cohen (2004) explains that for marginalized groups, “everyday life decisions challenge, or at least counter, the basic normative assumptions” of dominant society (p. 33). I contend that that is done by Lepore, who’s everyday choices of embracing sexuality, promiscuity, and nudity challenge societal ideas that trans women are only deserving of respect or success if their enactments of sexuality conform to a modest heterosexual standard that affirms trans body’s undesirability.

All of this brings us back to the Heatherette/M.A.C. video: a weird, queer, sexy performance that breaks the rules of what is considered respectable and is therefore so essentially Amanda Lepore. While of course she is marginalized as a trans woman, Lepore has been able to leverage her position as a passing, white,^[7] successful artist, using her platform as an opportunity to challenge norms that limit the acceptance of a diversity of trans women. As Lepore explains in Doll Parts (2017), she overtly celebrates being trans, and loving being trans in order “to give a voice to all the girls who don’t have one” (p. 9). The latter half of Doll Parts (2017) diverges from the “mad-libs” trans narrative through its refusal to adhere to dominant morals and norms surrounding domesticity, queerness, and sexuality that mark only certain trans women as respectable. As Cohen (2004) argues, the accumulation of repeated deviance to norms, in this case of respectability, can make room for conscious resistance and a politics of deviance (p. 43), rather than of respectability. Lepore’s deviance from the politics of respectability has the opportunity to make room for more non-normative, and non-respectable trans experiences. Trans people are allowed to want to be visible, to be queer, to be sexual, to be naked, and we do not have to be respectable in order to be able to exist and to thrive.

References

Azzopardi, C. (2009, July 30). She… Amanda Lepore. Gay and Lesbian Times. https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?p=AHSI&u=ubcolumbia&id=GALE%7CGXGDTG5639724 43&v=2.1&it=r&sid=summon.

Brandon, B. (2024, July 8). Amanda Lepore: Illuminating Glamour and Resilience. ICONIQA. https://iconiqa.co/amanda-lepore-illuminating-glamour-and-resilience.

Carrie S.. (2006, February 20). The Joan Rivers Show – Club Kids Interview [Video]. Youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAm1RcsCOEg.

Cohen, C. J. (2004). DEVIANCE AS RESISTANCE: A New Research Agenda for the Study of Black Politics. Du Bois Review: Social Science Research on Race, 1(1), 27–45. doi:10.1017/S1742058X04040044

Heyam, K. (2022). Before we were trans: A new history of gender (First US;1; ed.). Seal Press.

Higginbotham, E. B. (1993). Righteous discontent: The women’s movement in the black baptist  church, 1880-1920. Harvard University Press.

Jorgensen, C. (1953, February 15). Story of My Life [newspaper clipping from America Weekly]. Christine Jorgensen Collection (j098zb242). Louise Lawrence Transgender Archive. Digital Transgender Archive. https://www.digitaltransgenderarchive.net/files/j098zb242

Joshi, Y. (2012). Respectable Queerness. Columbia Human Rights Law Review, 43(2), 415-467.

Lepore, A., & Flannery, T. (2017). Doll Parts. Simon and Schuster.

Lepore, A. [@amandalepore]. (2022, December 23). Happy Birthday to ME ! I had so much fun  at @bartschland Working Girls party to celebrate her annual Toy Drive! Happy Holidays ! [Photograph]. Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/p/CmiMgh3LAzE/?img_index=1

LexiCarter. (2011, August 13). Heatherette M.A.C Cosmetics In Store Video Starring Amanda

Lepore Directed By David LaChapelle [Video]. Youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAIzAzpWxK4

Macsurak, C. (2007). Amanda Lepore at Hydrate, Chicago [Photograph]. Wikimedia Commons. https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Amanda_Lepore_at_Hydrate,_Chicago.jpg

Siemsen, T. (2017, September 19). Amanda Lepore on becoming what you want to be. The  Creative Independent, https://thecreativeindependent.com/people/amanda-lepore-on-becoming-what-you-want-to-be/.

Skidmore, E. (2011). Constructing the “good transsexual”: Christine jorgensen, whiteness, and heteronormativity in the mid-twentieth-century press. Feminist Studies, 37(2), 270-300. https://doi.org/10.1353/fem.2011.0043

Street, M. (2019, September 19). Relive the Hedonistic Glory Days of the 90s Club Kids With These Photos. OUT Magazine, https://www.out.com/nightlife/2019/9/19/relive-hedonistic-glory-days-90s-club-kids-these-photos#rebelltitem23.

Werner, M. (2013). Amanda Lepore, Dean and Dan Caten – Life Ball 2013 [Photograph]. Wikimedia Commons. https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Life_Ball_2013_-_magenta_carpet_Amanda_Lepore,_Dean_and_Dan_Caten_01.jpg).